Tales of Idiocy and Woe...But Now I'm CRAZY in California!

Saturday, July 02, 2005

What?! The ficticious conversation...

This just happened. No kidding. Well, not entirely. This conversation is a collection of various conversations I have daily with customers at the computer store that I work at. Ever comment in here I've actually received, but this conversation is actually ficticious. The contents of this conversation have been shortened, changed to make it a tad more funny and the names of the individuals have been changed to protect them...

Customer: Hi. I'm calling about you add in the paper. How does it work? (I get this question, in this exact form, daily)

Me: Uh...I'm guessing you're interested in buying a computer?

C: How do I buy one?

M: You usually give me money.

C: What kinda computer is it?

M: Well, we have a wide variety of computers for various prices. The $27 a month in the add is the price of financing a $599 system over 36 months. I'm guessing that you're interested in financing...

C: I guess so. That's the monthly payment thing, right?

M: Right. Well, we do financing through (company name) and it involves (details). So do you know what youre current credit history is?

C: No. I don't know about my credit history.

M: So, have you ever done anything through credit?

C: No. I've never done anything through credit.

M: Do you have a credit card?

C: No. I don't even have a debit card.

M: ?! Okay. Well, seeing that you don't have a credit history, you might need a co-signer for getting financing...

C: Can you co-sign for me?

M: ?!

C: Can you?

M: You don't know what I'm talking about, do you?

C: No.

M: ...maybe you have a friend or a family member who can co-sign for you.

C: I have a sister. She has a computer.

M: That's great. Maybe she could co-sign for you and you could use her credit to get your own personal credit history rolling.

C: She's got a nice computer. She bought 6 months ago from Dell. The people on the Dell phone talk funny.

M: Great. Well, I'd talk to her and ask her to co-sign for you.

C: Do you have a computer like her's?

M: I'm not sure what she has, but I'm sure I have something similar. Let's talk about your employment status. Where are you currently working?

C: ...

M: You're working, right?

C: No. I have a student loan though.

M: Uh, a student loan is not technically a "source of income"...that's why it's called a "loan" and not a "job".

C: I get like $600 a month from it.

M: But that's not technically a job.

C: I'm not working. I'm a student.

M: So that means you don't have a job...? It helps to have a job when you want to borrow money from a financial insitution. When you have 'zero income', it makes financial insitutions suspicious that you won't be able to pay them back the money you borrow.

C: Okay. Well, can I get financing?

M: I'm sure you can, but it would help for you to have a job and a co-signer. I can try to apply for financing for you, but I'm pretty sure it's not going to go through seeing as you have no credit history and you're unemployed. Also, if you get rejected on a finacing application, it hurts your credit history. It would most likely be wise to sort out those issues before jumping into the deep end.

C: Gee. Thanks. You know a lot about this stuff. You should be a financial planner or something.

M: ...uh...?!

C: Have a good day.

M: Thanks. You too.


Sadly enough, this conversations occurs daily at my place of work...Minor changes, but same bizarre goofy conversation. Around 4 times a week I have to explain to people why a 'loan' is not a 'job' and why having no credit means you have no credit. Also, people are not always so polite or articulate. I'm surprised that Saskatoon is not heavily involved in the aerospace field, seeing as there are apparently so many rocket scientists in this city. Until Next Time,

The Armchair Geek


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