Let's STOP the rumors...

Okay. I know that there's been rumors running around Virginia (and therefore Calgary and Regina) about me having a girlfriend (say it in a falsetto like "Pastor P"). Well, these rumors are NOT true. We rcently broke up, and here's why. When she abandonded the church and announced it to the world, I had to cut her lose. Good luck on your film career babe, but now we're all prayin' for you. On the flip side, this does mean that I can start returning Mandy Moore's calls now...and if ANYONE gives my new number to Paris Hilton, I'm blocking you on my MSN. What a crazy-annoying girl! Calling me at all HOURS of the night..."Let's go crash a Porsche!"..."Let's sneak into Warner Brothers"..."Let's get high on cocaine at the Viper Room and run down the street!"..."Can you post bail for me again?" Sheesh. Until Next Time,

The Armchair E-Magnet