Tales of Idiocy and Woe...But Now I'm CRAZY in California!

Thursday, October 13, 2005

What is it with people and crime?

I don't have a clue what the deal is today, but I've had the same call twice in a row, in the last 5 minutes. Two people called me wanting help installing their admittedly illegal copies of Microsoft Office. One conversation excerpt:

Customer: I can't figure out what's wrong with my copy of Office 2003. It won't take my product key. The guys at the university that made the copy said that it would work.

Me: Excuse me? The guys at the university? Did they give you a liscence sticker with the copy they 'made' for you?

C: A what?

M: A liscence sticker? You know, the green and blue sticker with all the numbers on it?

C: Uh, I don't have that. Mine's on a post it note. It's yellow.

M: Uh, seeing that you admitted that your copy is burned with a post-it-note for a liscence, I'm not completely confident that you're trying to install a legitimate copy of Office 2003. I'm also not going to give you tech support on pirated software. If this conversation was recorded, I'd be in super big poo-poo with the powers that be.

C: Pirated? What are you talking about? Mine's not pirated! The guys at the university said I could use this copy they made me. They've given it out to hundreds of people and they've never had a problem with it! Why isn't mine working?


And the conversation continued. What kinda logic is that? Mine's not pirated because those 'tech guys' at the university gave out hundreds of copies? He might wanna stop by the medical wing for some intern to practice her C.A.T. scan skills?

The other call was super good too. People are simply amazing. Amazing. Hmmm...I wonder if Microsoft has a 'tattle line' for reporting pirates. Well, I might want to tread lightly there, in case they decide to come by my house with the reward cheque and see my stash...

"I SWEAR officers, it's all my room-mate's stuff! It's Blackjack's, not mine!"

Even though that would be true, I'd be like the boy who cried wolf and then was killed like 42 times over by the wolf. Until Next Time,

The Armchair Microsoft Informant.


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