Guess who's back?

It's not "Slim Shady". Not even close. It's "Slim Stupid". I just got off the phone with Slim Stupid. Here's the call:

Me: Thanks for calling (store name), this is the Armchair Geek speaking. How can I help you?

Slim: Hey. I just had my computer stolen and I'm wondering if I can get a quote for a replacement.

Me: Well, I can definitely give you an idea. Do you know what kind of computer it was?

Slim: No. I'm not a computer expert.

Me: Okay, if you give me your name or number I can look you up on our database.

Slim: I didn't buy it from you. I hated the store I bought it from because they were idiots and didn't ever help me.

Me: Well, I can definitely help you with a quote. Do you have a copy of your original receipt?

Slim: No.

Me: What store did you buy it from?

Slim: I forget. Why does this matter anyway? Just give me a quote on a replacement computer! Why is this so difficult for you?

Me: Okay. Well, not having the needed information kinda makes things difficult. I can give you a quote, sure, but I need to give you a quote on something specific. If we don't have any sort of specifications to talk about, I could quote you anywhere from$500 to $5,000. I'm guessing your insurance company would not be too excited about that and you'll need some specifications in order to get money from them.

Slim: (Getting very aggressive) Look! I just got off the phone with SGI and they told me that I didn't need anything but a quote. They didn't need an original receipt, nor original number crap. They just needed a price! I can see here that YOU don't want to help me either!

Me: Well, I'm trying to help you Slim. I've done plenty of SGI insurance claims, and I can assure you that they're not going to just give you any amount of money you ask for. You'll need to find out what you had, and that involves some sort of information from your original vendor on the computer. They need to know how much money you originally spent so they can give you something equal in value. If you originally spent $1,000 and I give you a $3,000 computer, SGI won't go for that.

Slim: What?! Well, obviously you DON'T want my f*cking money! Have a nice f*cking day!! (hangs up)

***

Well, chalk one up for the proletariat. They should not be allowed to use phones...although I love calls like this; they give me something to blog when it's slow in the store. Hooray! Until Next Time,

The Armchair Geek