Tales of Idiocy and Woe...But Now I'm CRAZY in California!

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Me and my big mouth...

Yeah...Occasionally the 'inner monologue' slips out. I plead temporary insanity based on the resurgence of residual nicotine into my system from a cigarette that I smoked in sixth grade. Anyway, here's the conversation:

Me: Hello, you've reached the Canadian Branch of the Tamil Tigers (NOT my real store name, and NO, I did not actually say that...that's not the tongue slip...)

Customer: Hello there. What's your cheapest computer?

Me: Well, we have systems starting at $399.

Customer: What's in it?

Me: Sempron 3100+, 512 megs ram, 40 gig hard drive, cd burner, windows xp, (and so on...)

Customer: Why is that so expensive?

Me: Oh? Is that expensive?

Customer: Yeah. Zellers has a computer with like double that stuff and a DVD burner for like $299. Why are you guys so expensive?

Me: I'm sorry, I think I misheard you. Where was that you say?

Customer: Zellers.

Me: Well, would you really want to purchase a computer from Zellers? I mean, it may be cheap, but are you ever going to get service or technical support from Zellers? You may save a dollar up front (and I checked the internet...all is numbers were wrong, no dvd-burner and the system was $429) but you'll most likely end up paying extra for all the tylenol that you'll consume when you run into a problem.

Customer: Well, I won't need support on it. It's a new computer. There shouldn't be any problems. (Not only a new computer, but most likely his first computer...lol)

Me: Okay. Don't get me wrong here. I'm not suggesting that you need to buy from my store. I'd just wonder if Zellers is the kind of store where you'd want to buy a computer from. I mean, you would never buy ground beef at Midas, would you?

Customer: Okay. You're an idiot. (hangs up)


Yeah. The whole "ground beef at Midas" comment was totally out of place. Although funny, the Russian judge gave me a 1.3 on artistic merit. My stupid mouth! I usually keep it in check well, but that one slip will come back to haunt me...I just know it! Doh! Until Next Time,

The Armchair Austin Powers

("How can I tell them that because of the unfreezing process, I have no inner monologue?")


  • Chef Geek,
    Worry not. Mentioning meat in almost any sentence is good. Hey, can you throw me the BBQ sause my way? I think i smell a steak a cookin.
    Dirty J

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:10 PM  

  • Man, Midas ground beef is da BOMB!!!!!
    But don't ask for any of that lean stuff either. Stuff tastes like rubber.

    By Anonymous Fangarang, at 1:45 AM  

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