Tales of Idiocy and Woe...But Now I'm CRAZY in California!

Friday, December 30, 2005


It's been boxing day for the last 4 days in a row! It's been freaky busy every single day and I feel like I'm trapped in Boxing Day, like on Groundhog Day. ("What if there isn't any tomorrow? There wasn't yesterday!") I mean, I'm making lots of money (kinda...though there's no markup on boxing day sales items...crap!) but I'm sick as a mutt and in need of some form of Japanese massage, or a hot tub, or something that would quality as 'pampering'. Right now I'm wearing pampers, (which is close) but unrestricted bowel movement was not really the angle of relaxation I was hoping for. Maybe I need a shampoo and a good scalp massage (my hair dresser is great at that!)

So, I just need to tell everyone...GO HOME! Stop spending money on things you don't need! Leave me alone! Stop calling every nanosecond! Eat the rest of your turkey! Spend time with your kids! Take your singing fish tie back to Sears for a refund! Just do anything besides bother me! ARGH!

Okay. Customers in the store again. I'm going to pass out any second. If I should die, I blame the n00bs. They're going to be my downfall...roving packs of n00bs shopping for "that thing in the flyer that was $400"...which doesn't exist. ARGH! Fighting off a migraine and whining like a freshman,

The Armchair Wuss


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