Tales of Idiocy and Woe...But Now I'm CRAZY in California!

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Here's a Little Something...

...To help you get to know me a little better. A friend has this, so I stole it and now I'm going to fill it out. It's called "I Am" or something. May you all follow the light of truth into the radiant warmth of love that is me:

I AM: Karma's whipping boy.
I WANT: The psychic ability to make stupid people shut up and leave.
I WISH: My door had some sort of 'idiot detector'. If it beeped, I'd know not to talk to you.
I HATE: "The Customer is always right".
I MISS: When I don't take the proper time to aim.
I FEAR: That one day I will snap.
I WONDER: Why people think swearing at me will fix a problem or make me want to help them.
I REGRET: Telling customers that it's not my fault that they're idiots.
I AM NOT: Allowed to say that to customers. I've been told more than once.
I DANCE: with joy at 8:01pm weeknights, 5:01pm weekends.
I Sing: Twisted Sister: We're Not Going to Take It! And I sing it LOUD.
I CRY: In an effort to manipulate irrational customers who are throwing tantrums.
I AM NOT ALWAYS: Successful with that.
I MAKE WITH MY HANDS: Several foul words in sign language. I'm moving on to simple phrases next, like "read the freaking manual".
I WRITE: Plans of revenge that will never be enacted due to my inability to acquire weapons grade plutonium...Oh, and I kinda do this blog thingie from time to time.
I CONFUSE: n00bs with plain old morons. My bad.
I NEED: More ammunition.
I SHOULD: Wear a shirt that says "I know you're not a computer expert" and point to it regularly.
I START: With a customer that is stupid or annoying.
I FINISH: With a blog post.
I TAG: And you freeze. Those are the RULES! STOP CHEATING! YOU'LL RUE THE DAY...!!!

So, now that's done and you all have a picture into the tar pit that is my mind. I'm glad we're freinds. I have eskimo kisses for you all. Until Next Time,

The Armchair Psychiatric Intern's Worst Nightmare.

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